A PERFECT WORLD AMONG IMPERFECTIONS

Inside the snow globe on my father's desk , there was a penguin wearing a red and white striped scarf. When I was little my father would pull me into his lap and reach for the snow globe. He would turn it over, letting all the snow collect on the top , then quickly invert it. The two of us watched the snow fall gently around the penguin. the penguin was alone in there, I thought , and I worried for him. When I told my father this , he said , "Don't worry ,dear , he has a nice life . He's trapped in a perfect world".

PS.  Hey there. Yes , you.
Thanks for asking me to write.
Its a nice "strange" feeling being caught in my own imperfect world. (Wink Wink)

Love More and Smile Often.........
This is the Midnight Girl Signing out........... :D :D

A "THOUGHTLESS" THOUGHT........

Well , I guess I'm breaking a self - written rule here , but I had to. We all are in the hang of that freedom bug , but don't you worry. Give it a week and you will be back to normal. The Indian flag that is kept shared in the social media will disappear within a few hours. Its just a matter of time!

The benefit of getting run down by high fever is that it gives you a whole lot of time for introspection as well as retrospection. Call it the effect of sedatives , but I thought a lot today. Meaningless thoughts racing in my mind. And then there was this much more meaningful thoughts. There were thoughts I kept pushing back in my mind , because even thinking of it was painful. There were things nobody knew , but to my utter shock , the whole world around me go to know. There were thoughts which were close to my heart , and I kept hugging on it , like my own little secret. There were my little "midnight musings" which I had not thought for a long time. It was like emptying a colour can , you know? Every shade colored that teeny corner of my heart , but off lately I find it all in blue.

I thought about the person I was and the person I want to be. Then came the thoughts of "what could have been" . And there were things I wanted to change. Oh yes , there were regrets , a whole lot of it. There were instances where I want to go back in time and change. Then it would be a "thoughtless thought" , you know. But I have learnt. Most importantly , I have learnt from the alternatives and my current situation. I have learnt that there would be certain instances in your life , where you wish things could have happened differently. but emerging out of it you become a stronger version of yourself. You reach a point , where it doesn't matter to you what rest of the world thinks , but you start to have that belief in your self. And they tell me this belief within yourself can do miracles. It can even change the whole flow of your life. It can make things work in your way.

I have done mistakes. I have fallen. I'm going through one hell of my blue days. But guess what? I come out every single time as a person I never knew which existed within myself. And each time , I learn . And I guess that's what life is all about , right?

PS. Every single day I miss you.
      You dot on my thoughts and there are times when I see you in front of me.
       Be happy where ever you are.
        You are immortal as you are always alive in my thoughts.

Love more and Smile Often..................
This is the midnight girl blacking out.............
   

#CELEBRATING 1 YEAR!!!!!!!

Last year , same day , I was confused and  doubtful about starting my blog. But , out of an impulse , I started posting and Goodness gracious!! I can't believe its been a year since that day. I never thought about lasting above a month , forget a year. But THANKS to you folks , in between all the chaos , I was able to post.......that too , around 30 posts! (Could I ask for more?)

Thanks to Dad and Mom , my spirit and soul. Without both of you ,I'm nothing. A Big thanks , to my family back at Srishti , especially to you , Keshav , for being my inspiration and light. (blessed to have you in my life!) My friends- my strength , my first critics and the ones who taught me to aim for the sky ( I owe you a lot ,  guys!!!) .

Again , thanks to all who check this little space of mine once in a while. Thank you!

PS. "K"....thanks for that teeny bit of cake and the key ring....:)
loved it!

LoVe MoRe & sMiLe OfTeN!!!!!!!!!!

This is Midnight girl signing out..................:D :D

#SUNDAY THROWBACKS WITH THOUSAND SPLENDID SUNS..:)

I just cannot imagine my existence without books. They literally are my lifeline. When I have nothing to read , I try re-reading. Every time , I re-read a fiction , I always find something new in it. This week , back at "Srishti" , we were starting up with the reviews. Here , we have to write the book review by being a character of that particular fiction , or , in other words , we have to get under the character's skin. This review sessions leaves me emotionally and mentally exhausted , if there is too much trauma or drama in the plot. But I feel this supreme satisfaction after every review session. This Week I chose to be Laila of Khaled Hosseini's "A Thousand Splendid Suns". I was literally exhausted and felt sore and somber after the Session , but it was one of my best review and I swear I was on cloud nine at that moment..........:)
And this time , I'm sharing this few lines from the novel (which I think is the BEST part). If you have not read it by now, make sure you grab a copy as soon as possible , folks!!!!!!

"When they first came to Kabul , it distressed Laila that she didn't knew where the Taliban had buried Mariam. She wished she could visit Mariam's grave , to sit with her awhile, leave a flower or two. But Laila sees now that it doesn't matter. Mariam is never very far. She is here , in these walls they've repainted , in the trees they have planted , the blankets that keep the children warm , in these pillows and books and pencils. She is in the children's laughter. She is in the verses Aziza recites and in the prayers she mutters when she bow westward. But , mostly , Mariam is in Laila's own heart , where she shines with the bursting radiance of a thousand suns."

PS.
Thanks "K" for my first A in my Review Session.
Humbled and Honoured...................:)

LoVe MoRe & sMiLe OfTeN!!!!!!!!!!

This is Midnight girl signing out..................:D :D

MILES TO GO BEFORE MY SLEEP AND MILES TO GO BEFORE I SLEEP.............:)

I agree , I'm not a great fan of poems. The way the fiction weaves its magic over me does not seem to work with poems. I don't have the enough patience to delve deeper and picturize the poems. Of very few poems I have read , I love Pablo Neruda , William Ernest Henley's "Invictus" - 'I'm the master of my fate and I'm the captain of my soul" , Kahlil Gibran for transporting me to nature's lap , William Shakespeare for "All the world's is a stage" ,  Emily Dickinson for "Heart , we will forget him , You and I tonight" and the list goes. But above all I swear by the works of Robert Frost - "Road Not Taken" , "Fire and Ice" and "Stopping by woods on a Snowy Evening". His poems work for me when I want to snap out of the trance and be normal again. Of course , "Miles to go Before I sleep" have always been my personal favourite, So this time , its this poem I'm sharing.........(None of my creation , hopefully....:P)

STOPPING BY WOODS ON A SNOWY EVENING.

Whose woods these are I think I know.
His house is in the village, though;
He will not see me stopping here
To watch his woods fill up with snow.

My little horse must think it queer
To stop without a farmhouse near
Between the woods and frozen lake
The darkest evening of the year.

He gives his harness bells a shake
To ask if there is some mistake.
The only other sound's the sweep
Of easy wind and downy flake.

The woods are lovely, dark, and deep,
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep. 

Robert Frost

PS......"K"...Cut the poems out next time , okay? Definitely not my forte.....:P

LoVe MoRe & sMiLe OfTeN!!!!!!!!!!

This is Midnight girl signing out..................:D :D

BEWARE OF BACKSTABBERS!!!!!!

You know its sickening when people come to you and say , "Hey , What's all this I'm hearing about you ?". Its  worse when we ask them from where on earth they did hear all this , they just give this superior smirk and goes "Oh no , A little bird told me!!!!"...And its even more disheartening to know that the above-stated "little birds" are the ones you thought to be your friends , or worse your best-friends.

They call this as "back-stabbing" or "talking behind the back." Even Julius Caesar , the Mighty Warrior , was backstabbed ! ( Remember the famous "et tu brute?")  You had/have (or may have/had) friends who act all sweet to you and once you turn back , they start bitching about you quite vigorously. Or even worse , the moment they get to know something fishy about you , they don't have the guts to ask that to your face. Either they try their level best to know what is happening from outside and prepare a much more interesting version and will continue with their "back-stabbing". Or they have the usual "emotional drama". They go like "Come on! Spill the beans....We are your "best" friends. We won't breathe anything to a living soul!!!". And trust me , when I say you this , the whole town gets to know what happened in your life by the next day.

I don't believe friendship is updating your timeline with "friendship quotes" and tagging as many people as you can on Friendship Day. Neither it is the sweet talking and telling how much they love and care for you or miss you. Nor it is sitting with you , hanging out with you for 24x7 or cracking jokes. It is being there for you when you need them the most. If they are your true friends , the moment they get to know something about you , "you" will be the first person they will be inquiring about it. Or the moment something worth sharing happens in your life ( Be it a fling or a top-secret) , you will ring them up the next moment because you  trust  them more than your life. True friends always speak up to your face instead of beating around the bush and stand with you when you are about to fall.

So, next time , you get to know the "back-stabbers" among your friends , never take the risk of trusting upon them....(again). They say experience is the best-teacher. Learn from your past mistakes and be careful upon whom you place your trust. The vase of trust that is broken once can never be the same again. And never get disheartened. If you are a victim of back-stabbing it simply means that you are two steps ahead of them. Make sure you give one hell of a time to your "back-stabbers" , folks!!!!!!!!!

PS. Keshav .....I'm sorry. Couldn't control the urge to give a proper reply to those who asked for it. After all , it was you who taught me..."If people talk about you behind your back , that would mean you are in front . So STAY AHEAD"......:) ;)

LoVe MoRe & sMiLe OfTeN!!!!!!!!!!

This is Midnight girl signing out..................:D :D

HAPPINESS IS?!.......:D :D

When I was younger and didn't have a slightest care about this whole wide world , my version of happiness was different. Too many stars on the night sky used to make me happy. A new flower in my garden used to make me happy.That one toffee I get when I search in my mother's bag without her knowing , used to make my cup of happiness overflow. But as time went by , I was pushed into the swirl of books and exams ,where you can think nothing but a bunch of formulas and equations. Gone was the girl without the slightest care. But still I didn't want to leave my mantra of life , "You only live once , so make sure you make every moment count". The easiest way to be ALIVE each moment was to BE HAPPY. So , I began to seek pleasure even from little things that happened in my world. Sure , I too have my blue days , but I somehow find a way to snap out of it.

So , in this post I would like to share some of the things that make me HAPPY!!!!! (No people , I'm not out of my mind.........:D)

1.

If my life ends like Susie Salmon from "Lovely Bones" , this is how my heaven looks like. Loads and loads and loads of books and a steaming cup of tea while its raining outside. I'm pulled to another world created by the author with the "tip-tip" of the rain as the background. Oh! I'm a blessed mortal! Could I ask for more?

2. 

When I talk to my best friends , few hours seems like few minutes. Added to the fact that I'm a chatterbox , they have no choice , but to listen me. (You know , I'm eternally grateful to you for that...to name a few - Aparna , Drishya , Gayathri , Rasly....and the list goes..:D). But it feels so good. I just can't live without talking!!!!

3.

That moment when I finish all my exams I have this feeling to tear up all my question papers and throw it dramatically from the top of a roof. I'm free!!!! That feeling of not having to study a thing and nobody saying anything against it is just overwhelming!

4.

The songs which have loads of memories , the songs which once made you groove , the songs which once made you cry , the songs which give yo the feeling of deja-vu......have you tried listening to it in one go? You should definitely try it people , if you have not done it until now. The joy I get screaming along with Taylor Swift's "Love Story", 1D's "Best Song Ever" and Demi's "Neon Lights" is just awesome!!!! Old songs never fails to bring colorful memories .  And colorful memories always make one happy........:D

5.

I and my cousins have done umpteen movie marathons together. We sometimes watch 8 to 10 films in a go - starting from Rom-Com , Crime thrillers , Fantasy , Drama , Horror , Classics.....accompanied with instant Maggie-noodles ,chilled Rooh-afza , Chocolates and what not! We may be knowing the dialogues of that film by-heart , but still watching it again with your loved ones makes it worthwhile! (Vishal.......Do you still remember "The Exorcist" and what happened afterwards???..:D :D)

6.

When I don't have to set the alarm for the next day , I'm like Olaf during summer times. I love to sleep!!! If I wake up in the middle of the night and realize I still have 4 hours to sleep , I nearly die of happiness. People , world is dazzling if one can sleep enough....:)

7.

Chuck out the part of white wine , but , oh! it just gives me such a thrill at star gazing.Sometimes , I sneak out to my terrace and get lost in counting stars. I just love to draw indefinite shapes in the night sky , without a slightest care in the world and be free from all my worries.........:)

8.

After going through torturous 2 months of summer , I long for a heavy downpour. The moment the clouds begin to break and the first drops comes down to cool the earth , I'm eager to capture them in my hands. That smell of mud and raindrops of first downpour makes me feel on top of the world! 

9.

Happiness is fairy lights!! I always wanted blue and white strips of fairy lights in my room. That feeling when you are surrounded by too many fairy lights , that to at night makes me feel special. I'm content and happy all of a sudden.

10. 

I'm sure most of you have done this. If you see your friend's crush approaching , primary goal of your life is to tease her till her cheeks becomes hot with embarrassment. You call her all sorts of nick names and mocks her , while her crush enjoys the show bemused. (I know this well , because , I , of all people have gone through this.........Courtesy to my darling friends.:P)

11.

Happiness is buying more and more books!!!! (at least for me!) . I know my shelves is in the verge of breaking down and it can't hold any more books , but still I can't resist the temptation of buying more books. It comes to a point when my father has to literally drag me from the bookstores. But folks , the pleasure of writing , "This book belongs to MALAVIKA" with a Deathly - Hallow symbol is just unfathomable.....:)

12.

Forget homework , the moment we get to know teachers are on leave , its like Summer Vacations that came 4 months early. We play the world-famous "Truth or Dare" (Yes , that's right , we are in  class 12 and the super seniors of our School.....:D) , create complete chaos in our class till the teacher from the next class comes to shout at us...:D :D

13.

When I know I have too many people to love , care and worry for me , I feel safe and secure. ( I really miss you guys and I just can't wait to see all of you!)

14.

I was in my Physics Class when I burst out laughing remembering something I did that was so stupid 4 years back. All of my fellow mates were looking at me like I was completely crazy and don't even ask me about the teacher. But that gut feeling after it made me happy folks. I was happy and I was glad that I did something stupid that was worth remembering.....:D

15.

And finally thinking about all the happy things make me happy. The silly things I did together with my friends , jokes we cracked , our hang outs , happy times with my cousins..........all this makes my life worth living............:)

While you are busy chasing your bigger dreams , never forget to seek pleasure from little things in your life. Because that's what makes one's life worth living.

Till the next time , lovely people!!!!!!!!

LoVe MoRe & sMiLe OfTeN!!!!!!!!!!

This is Midnight girl signing out..................:D :D

#LET IT GO..............

Have you heard the theme song "Let it go"  of the animated film "Frozen"? Of course , you have! Who hasn't , right? In your life , at some point , you have to let people go from your life. Not only people , sometimes you have to let their memories fade away instead of dragging it back from your memory attic. Sure , it would hurt like hell. You think of all excuses of not letting them go . But trust me , that would never work in anything - be that a friendship or a relationship. Sometimes, its all about letting them go.

Let it go because things between you and them are not same anymore. People grow apart and you realize that both of you want different things from your life , no longer understand or connect with each other. In such a case,  let them go instead of forcing them to stay with you. It will do nothing but suffocate both of you. 

Let go because the trust and loyalty between you isn't there anymore. If you know in your heart that you can't trust this person and he or she cannot be loyal , then you need to ask yourself why this person is in your life. Without any doubt, loyalty and trust are the backbone of any relationship or friendship. If it lacks both , it feels like nothing but a mere contract. 

Ask me , I know the pain of letting people go. I had this awesome friend and we swore to be the best of friends for the rest of our lives. But as time went by , we began to grew distant. Of course , I didn't complain and thought we both needed a break. But then , when she began to hang out with others and started avoiding us completely , it did hurt. It did hurt a lot. It was like an intuition , a haunting dream. And the saddest part was I couldn't do anything to save that broken friendship. No matter how much I try to forget , how much I try to forgive , that old warmness in our friendship can never come back.  It was frozen with time , I couldn't retrieve it back. So the choice with me was to let her go. And I did that. I just let her go. Unceremoniously. Without looking back. Without any words. It was as easy like cutting a chord.

But it did teach me a few things. It did teach me to be in the company of someone who is proud to have you in his or her life and will make that known to you and rest of the world. Be in the company of someone who won't gamble with your heart and mind simply because he or she knows you are not going anywhere. If someone is putting you down , competing with you , not paying attention to you , embarrassing you in front of others , remove the negativity from your life as soon as possible. Respect yourself enough to be able to walk away.

Find someone who makes you feel worthwhile and worthy. Find someone who fights to have you in his or her life. Find someone who feels how lucky he or she is to have you. Find someones who acknowledges everything you have done and will do. Don't waste your time on anything less.

PS. Yes , I just did take my frustration out and it helped!!!!!!

LoVe MoRe & sMiLe OfTeN!!!!!!!!!!

This is Midnight girl signing out..................:D :D

MMMM.........LET'S TAKE A SELFIE?????!!!!

Selfies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh!! Can you even imagine to live in a world without "selfies"??...Obviously not!!! Be it a get-together , marriages or worse , even a funeral , the function is not complete without a selfie. Recently , when I had my cousin's marriage , I was seeing my cousins after 2 or 3 years. But no , we didn't talk much this time. Instead , we took a lot of selfies - pouting ones , batting eyelids , making weird faces , sticking our tongue out.........(the list goes). We were not (of course) satisfied with a "few" selfies. We took a million selfies of each category and deleted most of them......(I know , it is NOTHING but sheer lunacy.)

It just freaks the hell out of me when people go "Selfie time!!!!!!!!!!" every five minutes. Why is that we are Self(ie) obsessed? Have you thought of that? The reasons may be million , but here are a few!!!!!!!

1. SELF-OBSESSION SYNDROME. (SOS)

 Earlier , people used to gaze at mirrors for hours and hours just to get enough of oneself. But when the tech-era came , we switched into selfies. Do you spend hours and hours in taking umpteen selfies , deleting most of them , posting them on the social-networking sites and check in every 5 minutes to see how many likes and comments you have got? Yes!!!! You are "SO" obsessed with yourself! You just can't wait to let the world know how great you look in the camera and you have this supreme satisfaction when you get comments like "Babes...You look great!!!!" or 'You are SOOOOOO cute!!!". (Seriously guys??? Get a life!!!!!)

2. PHOBIA OF BEING WITHOUT YOUR PHONE.

We are "The Phone-hooked Gen". You can see the latest model even with a 12 year old , flashing up to date features and has everything about anything under the Sun. There are a zillion apps for literally anything - to find directions , to date , to eat , to drink , to sing , to sleep and even to pee. Your gizmo allows you to take all sorts of pictures in all resolutions and views , black and white , panoramic , faded etc. has driven the world to be more selfie-centered.

3.THE "EVERYONE-IS-DOING-IT" MANIA

Practically everyone in this planet Earth have been doing it. You know flip your hair back , just gaze at somewhere to give that forlorn look , show off your new-piercings or tattoo.......that's were Selfies comes to your rescue. You just don't want to be outdone by your relatives or friends. You just can't face the prospect of lagging behind. So , you also indulge in "Selfie-Mania".

4.SIMPLICITY.

Yes, taking pictures in now the simplest thing ever. Just a mere touch on the interface and you have a dozen beautiful pictures smiling back at you. Everyone ,  from the "dhoodhwaala" I meet everyday morning to my sixty-five year old grandpa , take Selfies! What's even better is that you can control the positioning of the camera on your face.

5.THERE'S NO ONE ELSE THERE TO TAKE THE PICTURE!

When go on trips , vacations or even a pub nearby , often , we don't have anyone to take the picture of us. The feeling of giving your phone to a stranger and ending up with a blurred and not-so-good picture sucks. Instead one prefers a simpler version of taking pictures : selfies with friends , alone or with loved ones.

6.CELEBRITY CONNECTION.

Instagram and most of the social-networking sites are flooded with "celebrity-selfies". Priyanka Chopra , Alia Bhatt , Ranveer Singh , Arjun Kapoor (the list goes) never misses a chance to pout or capture their emotions. In Hollywood , remember the selfie-craze that went viral after the Ellen DeGeneres Oscar selfie? Its net worth was estimated to be between 800 million dollars and 1 billion dollars! Yes , pure madness! But , as much as it was expected , the fans, or , more specifically , the world just blindly follows. There will be more "Selfies" if the celebrities are doing it.

7.ACCIDENTALLY ON PURPOSE.

One theory of mine is that selfies were invented by mistake : Imagine somebody trying to adjust his phone while in the process of handing it over for someone else to take the picture. Or maybe someone goes to check he makeup on the phone's camera and accidentally ends up with a selfie? Quite a possibility , eh?

8.JUST TO "FAKE".

Selfies are a great  way to portray you as someone you are actually not. You may appear to be cool , calm and a total fashionista on your selfies , but in your real life you may be just the opposite. People soon start to categorize you in two versions - the "Selfie" you and the "Real" you. And what irritated the hell out of me is the fact that when you post Selfies on social-networking sites , you do with a caption which has no relation with your pic. It just feels so "fake". ( I assure you its a tad bit DISGUSTING.)

The selfie-obsessed generation is one in which we live. So should we make a fuss about this Selfie-ism? No way. With everything good or bad that fades with time , so will this. Eventually , the world will have had enough of "Selfie-ism" and will divert their focus to something much more attractive and cool. Selfies will be dwindled away only to be remembered by us when our hair turns grey. So , for now , sit back , relax and pose while you take a selfie!

PS. Picture Courtesy to Pin-Interest and Google.
Any coincidence with anyone in this article is totally unintentional......;) (Or so I think!)

LoVe MoRe & sMiLe OfTeN!!!!!!!!!!

This is Midnight girl signing out..................:D :D

CREATIVE WRITING........#1 ........WHY DO I WRITE?!!!!!!!

Of all the places , I have written something , I never thought I would be writing (or typing) in an outdated laptop, cramped in between 2 guys and a mentor who does not leave a stone turned about telling how much better can your works be.

.As I was getting ready and stuffing things into my bag , I was excited. About the whole "Creative Writing". I hardly took a bite of my sandwich and ran out on the fear of being late for my first class. I was joined by a frantic-looking Vishal who was muttering and swearing under his breath. The moment I steeped inside the Workshop , I was completely blown away. It was artistically done and had huge Victorian windows and the bean bags of different colors were bathed in the sunlight. I was seeing such a place for the first time.

The gorgeous receptionist , batted her eyelids and issued our passes and an ID card. We could hardly contain our excitement and wishing each other all the best wishes , we parted to different floors. When I saw the Creative Writing Department , I was again baffled. The room literally had no walls. Every inch of it was covered with posters , collages and what not. It was like a million colors was exploded right there. And an entire wall was covered with World Classics. (If there is a heaven on earth , it should be here.)

But when I searched for my fellow mates , I could spot only........well , 2 guys- Deepak and Avinash (You know , I did remember someone back home who was very dear to me..:D)  We said our "hi-hellos-names-where are you from" and took our respective seats. And then came "The MENTOR". I had expected a middle-aged man with glasses and somber look. But in came another guy who looked 19 or 20. At first , I thought he was going to take the seat among us , but no , he just stood there and grinned goofily.

"Hey There!!". He said cheerfully. "I'm going to be your mentor for the following Session. I'm Keshav and please don't bother to call me Sir. I'm (Please , please.....Don't tell me you are 16 or 17!) just 20!!!!!(phew!)".
"Last year , we had no applicants for the Creative Writing. This year , we had 5 and only 3 turned up. Let's see how long you last."
"Take the sheets and your pen and let your words tumble on. Write whatever you want to.  No restrictions and don't even bother about the grammar. Just write what is there in your heart."

I took out the paper and pen and just .........sat there staring at it. I had NOTHING to write.  NOT -A-DAMN-THING. I had many thoughts racing , but sadly I couldn't even pen down one.  Deepak And Avinash were done with two papers and I sat there like an idiot. Tears of frustration welled up in my eyes as I saw Keshav approaching me.

"Hey , What happened??". He asked.

"I can't write. I can't even pen down a word." I said meekly. I expected him to ask me "Then why on earth are you here."

"Its alright. Have a glass of water and come back . Then why don't you write about why do you want to write?"

Why do I want to write? I asked myself. Millions of answers popped in my head. I smiled and took the pen . Words tumbled out.

"I write when I'm happy. Because only words can express how much I'm ecstatic inside. I write when I'm sad. Because words always show me a way out of my blue-zone. I write when I have to vent my anger. Because ,at the end of the day , it helps me a great deal to calm myself.  I write when I have to be in peace with myself. I write when all the contradictions in this world cloud my mind. I write as a way of escape from the conflicts of my inner mind. I write when I feel over-joyed. I write when I'm crest-fallen. I write when I'm about to quit. I write when I feel like I'm going to scale new heights. I write when I want to think clearly. Because where the world ends , my words begin."

That was just the introduction. It took me an hour and 5 pages to feel satisfied with myself. When I handed over my work to Keshav , I felt REAL GOOD. Like I did something that was worth my time. This was one of those million times when I felt like I was going to quit. But , I'm glad I stuck by my rule of "Winners never quit and Quitters never win."

I don't know when I'm pop in here for the next time.
But till then ,

LoVe MoRe & sMiLe OfTeN!!!!!!!!!!

This is Midnight girl signing out..................:D :D

"THE " ULTIMATE HEALER

Tell me one thing , If you are hurt , what do you think is the best medicine? If the wound is physical , perhaps a Band-Aid or some bandages will do the work. If the wound is a "mental-one" , you can try sulking , screaming , crying or counselling....;). What if the wound is neither physical nor mental? have you thought of such a state? You just feel this heaviness in your heart and the world feels totally empty for you. No , Band-Aid or crying doesn't work for that. Then what will help?!

For me , my "earphones and the beats" is my ultimate healer for all kinds of wounds - be it physical, mental and what not. When I feel top of the world , I plunge my earphones , I switch onto "Chittiyan Kailaiyaan" (THE VERY RECENT ONE!) or "Balam Pichkari" or "Tu Meri"......("Messi-Lover".... wink...wink) ........etc etc.......and prance around. I don't have the slightest care in the world and they are some of the best moments in my life and I truly cherish them. (Except when my dad comes to check on me and he finds me jumping in and around without any reason......Its really embarrassing.) . When I'm crest-fallen , I listen to "The heart want what it wants" by Selena or "Chil Gaye Naina".....(Recent!!) and cry my heart out.

When I want to feel better , I listen to "Janib"...or "Galliyan"....or ..."Banjaara"....(Oh! the list in endless)......When I want to feel motivated , I listen to "Chasing the Sun"......(One among millions of songs!). You see , I have different songs for my different moods. All the lyrics of these songs , unleash the memories about someone or something , and it instantly makes me feel better. Every night , I just take my earphones with me to bed , curl under the blanket and just listen to my all-time favorites........I'm the HAPPIEST person in the whole UNIVERSE at that particular moment!!!!!!!

Be it happiness , celebration , heart-break , sadness  or that "crushing-feeling" , you just can't deny the fact that music is the ultimate healer. The moment the beats hit you , you feel all the adrenaline in your body oozing away. So next time , when you find yourself in a fix or can't think properly , try playing your favorite tunes and take some deep , calming breaths.......(Trust me!.....it will definitely help you out......)

PS......Grateful to my "Age-Old Transcend!!!!
Quoting Selena....."A day without you is like a year without rain......;)
And Dad....All I want for Christmas is the new version of transcend......the one with the colour screen and much more memory???? (Folded hands and puppy face....;))

LoVe MoRe & sMiLe OfTeN!!!!!!!!!!

This is Midnight girl signing out..................:D :D

ഗൃഹാതുരത്ത്വം

First of all , I would like to apologize for all the mistakes that follows in this post.......its been 6 or 7 years since I wrote something in Malayalam and it is a bit rusty. This font also is not favoring me well , so , you get the point..:)

എല്ലാ കൊല്ലവും സ്കൂള്‍ അടക്കുന്ന സമയത്ത് എല്ലാം കെട്ടി പെറുകി ഒരു പോക്കുണ്ട് – പാലക്കാട്ട് അമ്മയുടെ തറവാടിലേക്ക്. അതു പറയുമ്പൊ പുറത്തു ചുറ്റി അടിക്കാന്‍ പ്ലാന്‍ ഇടുന്ന എന്‍റെ സ്വന്തം കൂട്ടുകാരുടെ മുഖം തേനിച്ച കുത്തിയ പോലെ വീര്‍ക്കും. എന്നിട്ടു ചോദിക്കും എന്തു നിധി കട്ടയാണ്ണ്‍ അവിടെ ഒളിപ്പിച്ചുട്ടുളത്‌ എന്ന്. ആ ചോദ്യത്തിന് ഒരു പുഞ്ചിരി അല്ലാതെ ഞാന്‍ എന്തു പറയാനാണ്?

മാര്‍ഗശ്ശേരി – അമ്മേടെ തറവാടിന്‍റെ പേര് അതായിരുന്നു. ചെറിയ കുട്ടിയാവുമ്പോ ഒരുപാടു കൌതുകങ്ങള്‍ ഒളിപ്പിച്ച ഒരു വലിയ വീട്. അത് ഇനി തൊടിയില്ലെ മുത്തശ്ശി പാറ ആയാല്ലും , അപ്പൂപ്പന്‍ താടി ആയാല്ലും , ഒരുപാട് ഓര്‍മ്മകള്‍ നിറഞ്ഞ സ്ഥലം. മുറ്റത്തെ വലിയ മാവിലെ വയലറ്റ് നിറത്തിലുള്ള പൂവിന്‍റെ വള്ളിയില്ല് നിന്ന് കൊഴിഞ്ഞു വീണ പൂക്കള്‍ കൊണ്ട് കീരീടം ഉണ്ടാക്കിയതാണോ , അതൊ മച്ചിന്‍റെ മുന്‍പില്‍ നിന്ന്‌ ഭഗവതിയുടെ പൂജക്ക് കളമെഴുതുന്നത് അത്ഭുതത്തോടെ നോക്കി നിന്നതാണോ എന്നറിയില്ല . കനാലില്ലെ വെള്ളത്തിന്‍റെ കുത്തൊഴുക്ക് ജനാലയുടെ മറവില്‍ നിന്ന് പാളി നോക്കിയതാണോ എന്നറിയില്ല. ഒരുപാടു മരങ്ങളും പാല പൂവിന്‍റെ മണ്ണവും നിറഞ്ഞ സര്‍പ്പക്കാവ് മനസ്സില്‍ നിറച്ച ഭീതി ചെറുതൊന്നുമല്ല.

കാലം കഴിഞ്ഞപ്പോള്‍ 64 ആള്‍ക്കാര്‍ പണ്ടു താമസിച്ചിരുന്ന തറവാട്ടില്‍ ഒരാള്‍ മാത്രമായി. ഈ എം. ടി. ടെ നാല്ലുകെട്ടില്ലെ അവസ്ഥ. പൊടി പിടിച്ചു കിടക്കുന്ന വലിയ വരാന്തയും ഒരുപാടു ചപ്പില്ലകള്‍ വീണു കിടക്കുന്ന നടുമുറ്റവും ആണു ഇപ്പോള്‍ ചെന്നു കേറിയാല്‍ കാണുക. ഒഴിഞ്ഞു കിടക്കുന്ന തൊഴുത്തും , ആരും ആടാത്ത ഒരു ഊഞ്ഞാല്ലും നിറഞ്ഞ സങ്കടത്തോടെ മാത്രമെ നോക്കാന്‍ സാധിക്കുകയുള്ളു. 

അമ്മാമ്മേടെ കട്ടിന്‍റെ ചുവട്ടില്‍ ഒള്ളിപിച്ച വളപൊട്ടുകള്ളും മയില്‍പീലിയും വീണ്ടും നോക്കുന്ന സമയത്ത്‌ എവിടെ നിന്നോ ഒരു സങ്കടം ഓടി വരും. പഴയ പുസ്തകത്തിന്‍റെ മണവും അതില് ഞാന്‍ ഒളിപ്പിച്ച ഒരുപാടു ഓര്‍മ്മകളും , ഇന്നത്തെ സായിപ്പിന്‍റെ ഭാഷയില്‍ feel of "Deja-vu" തരുന്നതാണ്. പക്ഷെ ഈ യാന്ത്രികമായ ലോകത്ത് ഫേസ്ബുക്കും, ഗൂഗില്ലും ശരണം എന്നു പറയുന്ന സുഹൃത്തുക്കല്ലോട് ഒരു പുഞ്ചിരി അല്ലാതെ എനിക്കു എന്താണു പറയാനുള്ളത്????

SUNSET , SEA AND...................(A LOT OF PEANUTS)

MUMBAI.......the mecca of Bollywood. The city of dreams. The city which never sleeps. I'm absolutely , head over heels in love with this dynamic and vibrant place. I love the morning rush and party mood by evening. I love the chaat by the road , the famous "vada-pavu" and kulfi. I can't resist those little stalls which has the little "jhumkhas", bands and lucky charms. And yes , I love bargaining with the street vendors for the second - hand books and what not.

But , above all , what keeps me pulling towards it might be the "Beach", and that too , in Juhu. I just love to stand in the sand , without my sneakers and let the waves wash my feet. I can feel the wind in my hair and I feel like myself free of all worries , even though it lasts only for a moment. (And it is one of the best feeling in the world , trust me!!!)

So , last year , after the camp I was supposed to go ,  I crashed at my cousin's place. They wanted to hang out and I promised to tag along. Vishal took his scooty and I , of course , took the back seat. I have had a crap day at the camp (that too with 13 guys and 1 girl who thinks nothing but when is the big sale is going to hit the shop) had totally left me bluffed in and out. What I really wanted to have was a nice long bath , lots of ice-cream and a sack and a pillow to crash in. But , of course , since I was staying with my "wonderful cousins" , none of that was going to happen, I just sighed , brushed my hair and left.

But , the moment I hopped on to the sand at beach , I knew I was wrong. No , I don't want a nice long bath . Nope. Neither the ice-cream nor the pillow could tempt me back from the beach. I just got out from my sneakers and ran and ran. (which left Vishal gaping at me like he had never seen me before.) He whipped out his DSLR from nowhere (you stalking photographer!!!!) and clicked thousands of photos. When I couldn't stand "that" nonsense anymore , we dragged him to the waters.

It was fun. It was past after the sunset and the crowd began to thin. I just sat there in the sand , tired , and felt the waves coming in . That rush and the buzzing voice like she is calling out to someone. I took it all in. Ooo!It was a pleasure to watch the white little crabs stuttering away in the white sand. The wind had taken its toll in my hair and I didn't even mind to distangle them. And I swore that someday or the other I will buy an apartment somewhere there. (you know , one can always hope!)

That's when I saw her. She was wearing a blue , polka-dotted skirt which reached just upto  her knees. It was soiled and tore at the end. Her hair had been braided to two little pigtails and she had a cute heart-shaped face. She didn't wear chappals and looked totally lost and clueless. I caught her staring at me thrice , and finally when I managed to catch her eyes and smiled , she began walking towards me. I panicked. (Of course , its one of my exceptional talent. I'm not good with strangers...:D)

Vishal was nowhere to be seen and she finally came close to me and stood there and smiled. I noticed she had a gap-toothed smile and those little dimples shouted out her innocence. She did remind me of someone I was missing a lot at back home. I sighed. Hrishi. I had missed him terribly over the last few days and I just wanted to give him a bear-hug the moment I saw him. She looked like a 6-year-old to me and she made me think of those evenings with Hrishi which I wanted to cherish.

"Didi , subah se kuch nahi khaya hai. 10 roopaya dhoge?"

"Naam kya hai tumaara"??. I asked her out of curiosity and she looked at me like "does-it-matter-to you" and crinkled her nose.

"Pari."

"Pari. Accha? Pappa kahan hai tumharra?"

And the moment I asked her question , I wished I had shut my big fat mouth. An unknown sadness which was way beyond her years touched her eyes.

"Pata nahi. Mere bhai toh sheher mein kaam kar rahe hain. Mein toh wahaan rah rahi hoon." She pointed indefinitely to a distance.

I fished through my purse. All I had was two notes of twenty rupees. I took it  out and gave it to her. At that moment , she flashed me her gap-toothed dimple smile.

"Kar kya rahe ho tum?!!!". Vishal shouted me over the buzz. "Pagal ho gaya hai kya? Bahut dekhi hai tumhaare tarah ke logon ko. ....jaao yahaan se". He snapped at Pari. She gazed him intently and disappeared in the crowd.

"Who do you think you are , man?!! She just asked me 10 rupees , not my freaking ATM PIN number!!!". I rolled my eyes at him.

"And I'm sure you would have given her that too. You're too much naive , Malu.  People can easily fool you."

I didn't reply to that because I knew it would definitely indulge us in an argument. So , I just remained content with my glass of chilled Rooh-afza. It was getting dark and Vishal was growing impatient and was mumbling something about a match. And we decided to go back.

It was then he started looking for his wallet.

"Shit........Oh Shit!!! It was just here.......It had my ATM card and around 2000 rupees.......Oh god!!!! Look over there!!!" He and I  frantically began searching for his wallet. It felt completely stupid and pointless to me. A single wallet , that too , among hundreds of people. But I didn't say anything and continued the search.

Just then I felt a tug at the hem of my shirt . When I turned back , Pari was smiling at me with a wallet in her hand.

"Didi......aapka hain? Yahhan gir gayi thi......aur mujhe aisa laga ki aap kuch dhoondh rahe hain."

She gave me the wallet and I handed over it to Vishal. He looked visibly relieved and looked apologetically at Pari. But she gave her gap-toothed smile and just ran. And I could do was nothing , but just stare at her. And the waves continued to lash against the rocks even more harder...............

10 TYPE OF PEOPLE YOU WILL MEET AT EVERY INDIAN WEDDING!!!!!!!

A month back I had my cousin's wedding and we had a gala time!!!!! It was after a long time I was seeing most of my cousins and it was then I realized how much I had missed them over the last few months. Of course , we had the "bear-hugging , mopping " session , and we did take some selfies - the "pouting" one , "the ultimate shaadi" selfie and such umpteen ones ( You get the point!).....We had the mehendi function and danced like a group of lunatics till we couldn't even a walk a step. We had the last time preps and the "great-grand-wedding" took place. Looking back , it was one of the best time I ever had and I doubt those magical moments will ever come back.

Admit it , weddings are the time when you bond with our cousins , discuss about everything under the sun , unleash the fashion police and be the ultimate foodie , right?.....So , in this post , let's see the 10 kinds of people you will meet at every Indian wedding............(Shoot!)

1. THE BRIDE AND GROOM!!

Its pretty much obvious...right?. The "D-day" cannot happen without these lovebirds. And yes , I have always admired them for standing the whole day , which would probably kill their feet and grin at the cameras like monkeys and say "hi-bye" to every person who they didn't even know till that moment existed in planet Earth........(hats off to you!!!!!!!!)

2. THE STALKING PHOTOGRAPHER

Yes , I find it flattering when you want to capture me in my new attire and my different poses. When you want me to pout , strike a pose and other candid shots and say how photogenic my face is. But no , I don't want you to ogle behind me the whole time and tag me in every single pic of mine in F.B. (And , please don't click while I'm eating.please!!!!!!)

3.THE CAMERA-OBSESSED.

They want to get clicked with every possible "chacha-chachi-mamma-mammi-phoofa-phoofi-brigade".They just can't get enough of showing their 32-s at everyone. And worse , they want to click selfies every damn moment. (Yeah..even when they are eating.:P).

4. THE SHAADI.COM AUNTY.

That aunty who wants to know if you are married or not. She is disappointed if you are married , otherwise she has all the contacts for you to get hooked up. (Just 2 minute silence for my "anonymous" cousin , who is  next on the list and gets strangled every time by the "shaadi.com".......:D)

5.THE ULTIMATE DIVA / DRAMA QUEEN / FASHIONISTA

Eye-candy of the wedding , who makes sure the shot is perfect with her Manish Malhotra ensemble. She whips out the lip-gloss , liner and foundation miraculously from her little pouch for the "touch-up" every five minutes. (yeah...the miniature Shanaya from The Student Of The Year....:D)

6.THE GROOM'S BEST BUDDY.

Undoubtedly, he is "the" best-looking guy from the lot. You just can't take your eyes off him 

and does everything to get you noticed by him.......(Ultimately to know that he has been married..........Right "You-Know-Who-You-are"????)

7. THE FOODIE GUEST

They make sure they have a bite of everything. Right from starters , to kababs , and pakodas , and samosas , to the 5-course and dessert and kheer and sweet and ice-cream. All they can think is "foooooooooooooood!!!!!!!!"

8. THE ONE WHO GOT GROOVES LIKE "CHIKNI CHAMELI"

The one who knows the exact steps of "chikni chameli" , "radha" , "punjabi wedding song" and the list goes. He/she knows the grooves that sets the party in motion and the crowd blindly follows them. (yeah......I still remember the "london thumkada" and "drama queen" and "saturday saturday"!!!)

9.THE GOSSIP MONGERS

The ones who knows anything and everything about everyone at the wedding. They are on the front line when it comes to criticizing someone or be it bitching about your closest relatives. (Yeah..the "ultimate-nasty-ones".)

10.THE WEDDING CRASHERS.

The ones who check out the venue just for good food or fun or just to check out the "eye-candies" at the wedding. If they get caught , they are either from bride's father's side or groom's mother's side. (I remember the "white shirt and black pants" too well guyz..:D :D )

After all weddings are the time you go "tudakam mangalyam......tantunannena"

"pinne jeevatham.................tuntaneena"

So make the most of it!!!!!!!!

PS.

Eternal gratitude to all my cousins for a gala time!!!!!!

and picture courtesy to Google and Pininterest. 

LoVe MoRe & sMiLe OfTeN!!!!!!!!!!

This is Midnight girl signing out..................:D :D

MY"DOCTOR-WHO"

Some people comes to your life without any reason. They are like sea-breeze - comes and goes without a single warning, but leaves you with a lot of memories , that is sure to last for a life time. Well , "he" came into my life just like that. (Don't get any ideas...........he is much older than me...:P)

We have this "huge gap" of 12-14 years between us. (probably more.) He is a doctor and I'm studying in class 12.(Or just in a few days , anyway....;) )...Call it fate or destiny.........we met accidentally. It was not a meeting , even. He is my best friend's cousin and he had read my "the Fault In Our Girls".
He said he loved the "fiery attitude" , but asked me to keep that spark of a 16 year old. Eventually the ice broke between us and he became my confidant. 

We don't talk much often , but I know he is there for me when I need him the most. I can say anything to him and with him tomorrow is even more bright and hopeful. He makes me laugh and sometimes he makes me want to kill him. (oh yes , sometimes , u do!!!!). We share different opinions about almost everything under the sun and its a pleasure to share it with each other. With him I don't have to pretend something I'm not and it feels  great to be in ease with oneself...........:)

What's great about him is that he doesn't treat me as a "kid". He is all ears to my views and treats me as an "individual". He was the one who taught me to say "NO" if one needs to say so. (For this , I would be eternally grateful to you "doctor-who" , and you know it very well.). He reads my every post and is a honest critic. ( Yes , he calls a spade a spade.)

 As today's FB generation may tag , he is not my "chWeET Bro".(Ew......I wouldn't even dream of it!) I have no blood relation with him. Heck! I haven't seen him till now. I don't know how he looks or how he talk to someone. But , guess what? I'm happy the way it is. I don't even know if I will see him ever at some point in my life. But he is this big part of my life and I'm honored to have you as a great friend. Even if we lose touch someday , I would like to thank you for all those wonderful memories and for being a great support system when I needed my friends the most.

 Thank you "Doctor'Who". For Everything........

LoVe MoRe & sMiLe OfTeN!!!!!!!!!!

This is Midnight girl signing out..................:D :D